Reality

Okay I think this blogging thing has become therapeutic for me. That means I may unleash the side of me I don't want anyone to see, you know, the real side. Reality this week is realizing how much of a grudge holder I am. I can remember so many of the hurtful things that were said or done to me, even though I have supposedly 'forgiven' these people. Why do I do this?? Sigh, I guess no one is perfect. That being said I am still striving to be as perfect as I can be. I would like to blame my struggle to forgive on my less than perfect past, or other such woes but in reality it is probably my stubbornness. Something I try to work on constantly but always lingers around. Letting go of some of the things of the past is a must for me. That being easier said than done, it will probably take a while for me to change my ways. Hey, at least I am starting down the right road. The road to recovery; Recovering some past relationships that may have been, or are still being, hindered do to my lack of humility and forgiving.  

I want the Lord to forgive me on a daily basis. I want my kids to forgive me when I have a long day and raise my voice at them out of frustration. I want my husband to forgive me when I forget to do something he ask. Why then do I not forgive everyone else? Well starting today I will try. Try to remember that, much like myself, no one is perfect. Things are said out of anger or frustration that never should have been said. I don't want to lose any more relationships over things that were said weeks, months or even years ago, that I can not get over. Now if only it were as easy as writing on my blog makes it seem to be. I guess all good things are worth working for.